Preview Mode Links will not work in preview mode
  1. All Episodes
  2. Design Your Life with Clarity

Design Your Life with Clarity

Apr 29, 2020

High Achieving Women - Listen Up! 

 

Emily’s guest, Christy Rutherford helps highly successful women design their lives with clarity. In other words, she helps high achieving women who 1) are confused about what they want to do next, 2) are brilliant and can do 10 things really well but need to start with one, and 3) are burning out and frustrated in their career because they’re workaholics and high achievers. Furthermore, many women in leadership are silently suffering in their success. Christy knows what these women are feeling because she was there and it almost killed her. 

High achieving women know they have untapped potential within them and Christy helps them get clear on where they want to be. Furthermore, she helps them tap into their potential and live a life of success and fulfillment. Christy is a globally recognized leader. She assists women in leadership to get unstuck, make more money, have more peace, and enjoy more fulfillment in their personal and professional lives. In addition, Christy is a keynote speaker and author, publishing five #1 best-selling books on Amazon in eight months. A Harvard Business School Alumna, Christy is also a certified Executive Leadership Coach from Georgetown University and has been featured in Forbes three times.

 

Episode Highlights:

 

  • First, Christy shares her background and why she has a passion for helping high achieving women design their lives with clarity.
  • Christy says most women in leadership are silently suffering in their success. 
  • And Christy used to be one of these high achieving women so she knows how they feel.
  • Women don’t have to self destruct. Furthermore, they can design their lives with clarity. 
  • Then Christy explains that she became the person she needed 7 years ago.
  • Next Chrisy explains how the Georgetown Coaching Program allowed her to find her authentic self.
  • In other words, Christy realized that life made her someone completely different and Christy didn’t like person in mirror.
  • Christy’s body was shutting down. She had 17 medical conditions
  • Christy says she had a bad boss; however, she realizes her forrest was on fire before her boss showed up. And he just threw lighter fluid on her fire.
  • After that, Christy explains why it was hard for her to find someone to talk to about what she was feeling. 
  • In other words: “People don’t allow their super heroes to be human.”
  • Christy got caught in the superwoman mode and men didn’t understand what Christy was going through. 
  • She had 13 mentors but still didn’t feel heard. 
  • In other words, they only saw the superwoman and they didn’t hear the hurt soul.
  • Christy knew she was dying. She was sick need to leave her job but people cared more about the organization than Christy. 
  • Christy now realizes she was seeking validation and confirmation from others when she knew what she needed to do in her heart. 
  • In other words, she felt she was being held hostage to a life that had a lot of pain for her.
  • Next Christy tells us “You know when its time - your body and mind know.”
  • Christy says when she shares her story, a lot of women say - “you’re talking about me”. 
  • By the time we throw up the white flag we’re already downing. Also, women don’t want to seem weak and whiny. There’s lots of guilt when you have the success other people want and you’re miserable.
  • Christy’s goal is to inspire people to change before life makes them change.  
  • For high achieving women, the first thing that goes is taking care of yourself. 
  • Christy knew she needed to change but she wasn’t ready. In other words, she knew what she wanted to do but didn’t to it until life made her.
  • As a coach, Christy provides accountability. She expects results from her clients.  
  • Christy tells Emily that many times she requires her clients to do nothing for 2 weeks. 
  • Next, she explains what this means, since Emily says she, like most high achieving women, doesn’t know how to do nothing.
  • Then Christy explains that every super hero has an alter ego because you can’t be a super hero all the time. No one gives us permission to be Clark Kent and take our cape off  for a day.
  • Overachieving women are addicted to doing. First, Christy helps them get their mind and health right.
  • After that, Emily and Christy talk about leadership. Leadership is tough! 
  • Christy says everyone has this polished image about what being a leader is - that’s a lie! 
  • Also, many high achieving women leaders never stop to smell the roses.
  • Christy never stopped to reflect upon her accomplishments. 
  • Furthermore, Christy observes that women don’t feel successful regardless of awards etc. We collect roses along way and we need to look at the flower field that’s behind us. Thats how you can settle into “I’m worthy”.
  • Next, Emily shares her observations on why she finds it hard to reflect upon her accomplishments.
  • Then, Christy explains that typically every challenge we have is rooted in childhood situation and can explain why we never feel successful. Furthermore, if we solve that first, it unravels and rewrites script of our life. 
  • Also, it doesn’t mater if make $1B, we can still never feel successful.  
  • Next, Christy shares her childhood story and reflects upon how her childhood impacted her career.  
  • In other words, why Christy felt she had to prove others wrong and how she almost killed herself trying to do it. 
  • Christy then explains the challenges of being one of the few female black officers in the Coast Guard. 
  • Next she reveals how she spent her whole life chasing validation from people who would never give it to her.
  • Finally, she explored how she got there. She was working 80 hours a week, she was single, she sacrificed so much to prove others wrong, and she was  devastated.
  • In other words, she gave away her ability to validate herself. 
  • Also, she realized others were never supposed to validate her. 
  • After that, Christy explains her Georgetown Coaching experience and how she discovered the military Christy and the Christy Christy. 
  • We get lost in life - work and home self and its not ok. In other words, we need to be able to function as the one self.
  • Christy and Emily discuss the impact of the coronavirus and that fact that self isolation is painful for high achievers.
  • After that, Christy shares she read a book by Napoleon Hill that encouraged her to see herself as she truly is - not her work self. 
  • It was then that she looked in mirror and said “I hate you”.
  • She explains now high achieving women neglect relationships, friendships, self care, all in the pursuit of what’s next and we never stop and slow down and look to see what’s behind. This is because we’re always going towards that next thing.
  • Life made Christy stop and she saw the carnage.
  • Christy shares two tips for high achieving women.
  • OWN IT and tell yourself the truth. Christy didn’t even know who she was anymore. Own your present reality, own the broken parts of yourself. It’s easy to say its someone else’s fault - OWN IT.
  • Figure out how you became this way and how to get it back. Christy says ask “Who has my marbles?” We were born with 100 and have 2 left! Do the work it takes to get them back.
  • Next Christy talks about the books she has written and those she has yet to publish.
  • After that, Christy explains how she finally decided to leave her job. First, she visualized her life after retirement. Then, she wrote down and said it outloud. As a result, the law of attraction produced a boss which created the optimum situation for her to resign. 
  • Christy forgave everyone in her story and that set her free.
  • In other words, she’s not holding onto resentment because blaming others doesn’t allow us to move forward
  • Christy helps her clients get clear on what matters and set priorities.
  • She didn’t have a clear vision and her time, energy, and money priorities weren’t clear.  
  • Christy shares a transformation one of her high achieving woman clients experienced and how she saw herself in that client. 
  • After that, Emily shares some of her story and why she retired from a very successful career at age 56. 
  • Furthermore, Emily was silently suffering and now she’s doing what she wants to do. 
  • Finally, Christy’s goal is to help those those suffering realize that, at end of day its not your job - its YOU!!! You are the problem.
  • Christy talks about her Vision Finder Master Class. Take that class and walk through a process to find your clear vision.
  • Don’t wait to see what happens. Be in charge of your life and make time for strategy, clarity, healing, self love. Get where you want to be.
  • Finally Christy encourages us to own where we are. To take responsibility for where we are and then pivot. She asks “what is success and money without fulfillment?”

Resources Mentioned: