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The Pressures of Becoming a Diamond: A Survivor Not By Chance with Aisya Carroll

May 10, 2021

Aisya Carroll is the CEO of Survivor Not By Chance LLC and author of the book, The Pressures of Becoming a Diamond. Furthermore, Aisya is a certified life coach, motivational speaker, mentor, advocate for childhood trauma, and consultant. Also, she mentors teenagers and young adults and creates programs for young children to help them cope with trauma. In this interview, Aisya is transparent and shares how she uses her own traumatic experiences as a tool to help others heal. Also, she shares her challenging life experiences with homelessness, neglect, abuse and abandonment. Finally, Aisya shares how she escaped the stereotypical "static" outcome.



Episode Highlights:

 

  • First, Aiysa explains that she tells her story because she doesn’t want others to feel alone. 
  • Telling her story lets people know that they can make it too.
  • Next, Aisya explains her upbringing. 
  • Her mom had Aisya when she was 16 and dropped out of high school.
  • Her mom would always tell Aisya, “I don't understand why your father denies you - because he knows what he did.”
  • When Aisya was 30 she had a conversation with her mom and asked her about her biological father.
  • Then Aisya's mom told her the story of how she was conceived.
  • At that moment Aisya had a whole new respect and appreciation for her mother.
  • Next Aisya talks about being homeless, having no electricity, and no food. 
  • Aisya could tell her mom was wounded and held some secrets.
  • Initially Aisya blamed her mother. 
  • However, once she became an adult and had her own children she softened up.
  • Aisya met her father and chooses not to have him in her life.
  • Because her mom was addicted to drugs, Aisya was responsible at a young age.
  • Aisya shares what a teacher told her about how she could get out of the neighborhood. And that stuck with her.
  • Also, the reason Aisya made it out of high school was because of her guidance counselor. 
  • Her guidance counselor taught Aisya to use her voice.
  • When she was in high school, no one knew Aisya was in foster care.  
  • One day she was at a friend’s house and her friend's mom wanted to take her home. 
  • Furthermore, there were drug dealers on the street and Aisya’s mom was  not home.
  • Read Aisya’s book and see how the story unfolds - in a way you wouldn't expect.
  • Also, Aisya's mom loves the book and told her daughter to tell her story.
  • Aisya is proud of her mother and her mom has an amazing relationship with her grandchildren.
  • Next, Aisya says she struggled with depression as a teenager and into early adulthood because she never dealt with the trauma. 
  • Also she witnessed a lot of physical domestic violence when she was growing up and didn’t realize there could also be emotional abuse.
  • After that, Aisya explains that college life at the New Jersey Institute of Technology was a culture shock.
  • Also, it was emotionally hard for her. At this time she wasn't talking to her biological mom.
  • Consequently, other women stepped into her life and mothered her.
  • Aisya was a mentor to young girls when she was in high school and college.
  • Also, she won a female leadership award in college.
  • Still, she hurt inside and the trauma showed up in her relationships.
  • Aisya started dealing with her trauma, hurt, and abandonment when she had her children.
  • Initially she did not take ownership for her part in a failed relationships.
  • Then she started to see areas she needed to work on to heal.
  • And, counseling helped her.
  • Now, Aisya is a certified life coach. 
  • Everything started to open up for her once she started her healing journey.
  • And, now she owns who she is.
  • Also, she’s grateful she can give of herself despite her hurt.
  • She specializes in helping individuals deal with trauma. 
  • Furthermore, she has her own method that works when the clients dedicate themselves to the work and the healing process.
  • She also created the Encouraging Young Champions Program for young students. In this program, she helps children heal and teaches them how to deal with trauma. 
  • She can relate to these students in many ways.
  • Next, Emily and Aisya talk about feelings and emotions and how many of us can't name our feelings.
  • Then Aisya discusses the mind body connection and how unresolved trauma impacts the body.
  • Finally, Aisya’s book, The Pressures of Becoming a Diamond, will change your perspective in regards to your own life and help you learn how to get through these challenges.

 

Resources Mentioned: